Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Quantum Cheating

Cheating. 

"Someone's definition of what constitutes cheating is in direct proportion to how much they themselves want to cheat."- Sex and the City.

Ladies, I come to you today with the question: What constitutes cheating? What's your definition of cheating? What do you believe to be a sign of cheating? 

I'm turning 25 years old in June and for the life of me I still can't and don't understand why people cheat on their girlfriend/boyfriend or spouse. I mean really! If you feel emotionally or physically attracted enough to the point where you want to be with them...then leave the person you're currently with. Cheating only creates a tangled web, it always ends up hurting at least one person and in the end it will come out. It cannot be kept hidden forever. 

(Ps: this photo should have been under the word "stalking" or "flipped out, crazy psycho girlfriend")


13 comments:

Samantha the ArmyWife said...

Funny you should ask this question a friend of mine and I were dicussing this very thing. I think that cheating is having either an emotional or a physical relationship with someone else. HOWEVER... I think that it is a stretch to say that you should leave the one you're with if you are attracted to another person because it will only create heartache. I haven't been married long but I do think that it is ok to have an attraction to another person- I think that during the course of a lifetime (theortically the length of your marriage)you are bound to have an attraction to another person... the key is not to damage what you have with your significant other by pursuing the object of your affection. =) well that's my two sence! =)

Abbie said...

I've never understood it either. My philosophy has been, if you're going to cheat, then leave the person your with! I have this theory that people who cheat on their husbands/wives or significant other do it hoping they'll get caught because they're too chicken shit to end the relationship the "right way."

Shoshanah said...

There was actually an article on this in the months Glamour with really interesting questions. Things like if your bf kisses a guy is that cheating (Readers said yes), if your gf kisses a girl is that cheating (no), if you gf kisses a girl several times (yes). Really interesting, you should check it out

SS said...

Here is another dimension... do men cheat more than women? I don't really know, just asking.

I think if you get to the point that you are going to act on an attraction, have the fortitude to and respect for your partner to walk away from the relationship first. I know good people can make mistakes, but that doesn't 'make it right.

SS said...

OMG, I think I saw that woman outside my office! ha ha. Picture is hilarious.

Mrs. G.I Joe said...

I agree with Samantha's first statment about it being considered cheating whether it be an emotional cheating or physcial cheating. To me, both are a betrayal...I also am not nieve and do realize that in ones lifetime there will be people who you find attractive but its what you do with that, that matters...You can look at someone and say they are handsome/pretty but then never think on it again. But if you start lusting after them, thats a whole different story that only leaves you open for a "cheating" mishap...You do not cheat on the ones you love! Why would you want to hurt anyone that deepy if you say you love/care for them...If you feel like your going to cheat emotionaly/physically then you need to end the relationship you're in...Its not necessary to hurt that person even deeper when the breakup will hurt enough...My two cents:p

Random Musings Of My Life said...

Wow I hope this is not about the boy..

And I agree with you....

Cookie Crums said...

I'm with several other ladies...cheating, to me, is an emotional or physical relationship. I can honestly say I've never been attracted to another man since I've been with my husband. It's not an option in my book...when I committed to our relationship..other men were off limits. Now, that's not to say I can't look at a man and think "he's attractive" but that's it. There are no other thoughts beyond that simple "statement" in my head. I've been married for almost 6 years now so I'm not newly married but don't have 10 or 15 years until my belt either.

I'm with you though. If you think about cheating or have the want to, just leave. I've never been in that situation (and Lord willing) won't ever be. So it's hard for me to give advice on what my reaction would be. But saying that, I'm a hot tempered, grudge holding kind of person. (I know that's not a good thing. It's something I work on but it's there none the less.)

THis is an interesting topic. I like reading what others have to say.

Karie said...

Sorry I've been MIA. I've been so busy! I did want to tell you a left you an award on my page, though. :) It'll be up in just a sec.

Teresa said...

Honestly at this point I wouldnt even know where to look for someone to cheat on my husband with. I feel oblivious. I cant explain it but I know others know when you truly love someone and are so devoted the thought never even crosses your mind let alone the situation. Cheating sucks. :)

hisMrs said...

I JUST realized I was not a follower of your blog! What the heck, right? I was wondering why you weren't in my google reader! Cheating is so stupid. I don't understand it. I don't think cheating has to be physical. If you do anything that your conscience knows is wrong, then that could be cheating. I dunno... I am a real stickler for it.

Mrs. Not-so-Domesticated said...

I'm not sure why people cheat. I could never willingly hurt someone I love that way. I was cheated on and it was the worst feeling ever. If you have the desire to be with someone else, just let your significant other go...cause obviously your no longer committed and thats not fair to them.

(army)Wife said...

Well, here's a questions: What's an emotional relationship? I mean, I have guy friends and Stonewall has girl friends and obvioualy emotions (of the non-platonic nature) are involved in those relationships. Does that mean we're both cheating? Or are we swingers? Hahaha! But serisouly, I think you can have a close relationship with someone of the opposite sex and it's not cheating. I think it becomes cheating when it turns physical.

(I hope this doesn't have anything to do with the Mister.)