Tuesday, October 26, 2010

I REFUSE to Settle

I refuse to settle. It's as simple as that. 
I'm 26 years old, unmarried, no children and single. Does that make me sad? No... ok sometimes. Do I want to get married one day and have children? Yes. But I refuse to settle for anything less than what I want and deserve. The majority of my friends are either married, have kids, having kids or engaged. Then there's me. I only notice my single hood when we're at gatherings. Or...

When I'm sitting at home alone watching the Sex and the City Movie. Realizing that the holidays are fast approaching and that the only people that I'll be seeing this season are coupled up. Can someone tell me, did I miss the memo? Everyone is walking two by two. When did this become Noah's arc? Well I'm still rocking the single title. 

I'm independent. I love to travel. I refuse to depend on anyone else for money or my livelihood. When a guy comes along that is equally independent, travels the world, has a job and doesn't depend on anyone else financially then my head will really turn. Until then these are a few things I'm wanting in a man. And of course I threw in some guys that I think are handsome...
 
I want a man who's rough, who goes a day without shaving because he's busy working. I want a man who can change a flat tire and check the oil in my car. Who can be handy around the house and can make me feel safe no matter where I'm at. I want a man who's honest, fair, loving and truthful. I want a man who wants to be with one woman forever and ever. I want a man who doesn't need to be on his iphone 24/7. I want a man who can love sports but will be happy to go ice skating with me in the winter. I want a man who loves to travel and be adventurous. 
I want a man who doesn't go out to the bar each weekends and still behaves like he's in college. I want a man who doesn't "sext" (sex text). I want a man who will hold my hand in public and open doors for me. I want a man who can laugh and laugh at himself. Who is content to sit at home and watch a movie on a Friday night. A man who wears pj pants around the house with slippers on cold nights. Who sends flowers without a reason.
 
Is that too much to ask for? Sometimes I wonder. I've lost a lot of faith recently in guys but I guess I just have to believe that he's out there and waiting to be found. Who knows, you never know what tomorrow may bring. So.. if you see me this holiday season at a party come over and say hello and introduce me to your single friends. HA! 

39 comments:

Samantha the ArmyWife said...

Good for you girl. Don't settle. but be open to the fact that no one man will be everything you want, all the time.

~Mrs. Guru~ said...

Good for you! You do deserve the best!

JMJE said...

You should defintely not settle. I don't think you are asking for too much. I mean if you want to get married then you will be spending a lot of time with this person so why would you settle for anyone who is less than awesome.

Bri said...

I don't think that's too much to ask for, and he's out there! I'm happy to hear you're content - I certainly enjoy reading about your travels! Best wishes!

Steph said...

He's out there. Don't settle for less than you deserve. And you deserve everything you are asking for.

Jennifer B said...

You know what? I don't think that is too much to ask for at all! I mean, this is your life and your relationship and you have to find things that'll make you happy!!

In the meantime, you are loving life, enjoying travels, etc and that's awesome!!

Steph S. said...

Ohhh man, this post really has my little brain/wheels turning! I've debated on whether to blog about how the perfect man you describe - is ME! laugh out loud funny! It sounds like the description my husband would give someone about what his wife's like. I'm totally the plumber, the carpenter, the problem solver, the independent person. We are completely arse backwards - he does the researching, the writing, the grocery shopping, the furniture rearrangement ideas... so weird. I love it. And i love that you are honest and open enough about what you know you deserve to blog about it. I always said, "I want to be depended on". I really am - I got what i wanted! lol... stick to your guns, you will find that perfect man-dude. You're a fab chick that deserves YOUR perfect guy. In time, hun. It'll come when you least expect it!

Alethea Noble said...

Never Settle!! BTW you have great taste is guys :-)

Tiffany said...

Jesse Williams is HOT

KK said...

This might not be the comment you were looking for. But thank you. Thank you for writting this and making me realize that I'm lucky. You just described my husband to a T. Sometimes I forget how lucky I am that I got a good one so early on and saved myself from dating dirt-bags.

Keep looking. I found Mr. Perfect so it's not like it's just a myth!

That's Sassy said...

Definitly do not settle!! I admire all the qualities you listed in a man! You will meet that guy, there is no timeline!

ModernMom said...

Not to much to ask for. Don't settle..it's important to know what you want.

{Selma} Crazy Little World Of Mine said...

If you didn't get the memo, I didn't get it either!!! Yes, where are the guys that open doors?! Haven't met one yet. Grrrr. :(
And hello Jesse Williams...sigh. :)

All the Small Things said...

This is a great post! And no one should ever settle for less than what is best for them. But someone else said this and its so true, no one is perfect or everything you want all the time. But being happy with your current life, just opens the door for better relationships.

Young Mom/Wife said...

High five to you! There is no reason to compromise your standards just so you can be in a relationship too. I love your strength and attitude about the whole thing.

Misty Michelle said...

This made me smile becuase JUST last night my roomate told me she needed a new BF for the holidays! HA HA. I don't know what it is about holidays that make us want a significant other so badly.

You should NOT settle! Maybe your perfect guy wont have EVER quality you want but he will most lilkely have all the things you never knew you needed until you met HIM!

Relationships are amazing but they are also REALLY hard so try and enjoy your single years. Sooner than you'd think you'll be all wifey'd up with kiddos running around!! XO

Loves ya!!

Krysten @ After 'I Do' said...

Don't settle. Seriously hold out... you'll find that guy.

Brittany Ann said...

It's not too much. Don't settle. He's out there. I promise.

AuntBT said...

LOVE this!! I'm right there with you, and I refuse to settle. I know I'm worth it :)

Hutch said...

I actually prefer to be single during the holidays. Save $ on presents and don't have to worry about being away from my own family.

Sunshinemeg said...

Never settle. I don't think you are asking for too much. He is out there, but in the mean time you are having fun and living your life. You are so adventerous and I know you will meet someone special on one of those adventures!

Florida Girl Meets the Midwest said...

Keep the faith, lady. I did not get married until my thirties so I remember all the pressure to settle down when all my friends were marrying off.

It is worth the wait. And the more whole you are as a person the happier your future will be.

Jessie said...

Girl, I feel you. 150%. I thought my dream guy had reversed his stupidity this summer.. only to discover that he cheated. And now I get to see a side of him that I never imagined.
I HATE being single, I'm SO much happier with my best friend by my side. But you know what? I've been married. With the money. And he was gay. (yes, literally. thank you, don't ask, don't tell.) If I wanted financial security and the whole bit, I could have it. But it's not what I want. And you know what? You shouldn't settle either. We can be single these holidays together :)

love jenny xoxo said...

you know what you want and that's the first step in getting it! definitely do not settle for anything less! You are worth it!

XOXO

samnhal said...

There's no reason to settle, because settling leads to unhappiness later on, and often divorce. There are guys out there just like that, and you'll find him!

JG said...

Never settle! It's so not worth it. The key to a happy relationship and happy marriage is to PICK SLOW. :) It's worth the wait.

Dollface said...

This is a great post. Never settle.. you will def find someone wouldnt settle for anything less than the best, xxxoo

Kelly and Sara said...

Way to go girl! Maybe if more people thought like you our divorce rate wouldn't be 50%

tootie said...

You are right - you definitely shouldn't settle! I'll keep my fingers crossed that you find a great one!

Mrs. Winder said...

match.com

It's were I met my hot/intelligent/outgoing/sexy/caring/loving husband. I recommend it for people who don't want to settle. Browse thousands of men, read about them, be as picky as you want and pursue.

:) happy man hunting

Cole said...

Your perfect guy is out there! Probably hiding with my perfect guy...but he's out there!

In the meantime - someone send me Scott Caan. Holy hot-ness. :-)

Tara said...

definitely don't settle, girl! you'll find him soon enough! enjoy being single and traveling, etc!

Brown Girl said...

Um, is there really a man like that? Haha, kidding...you should never settle, your man is out there!

saucyminx410 said...

They're out there - but in the meantime enjoy being you - the independent, single lady you are.

Random Musings Of My Life said...

DO NOT SETTLE!!

And yes you may have to kiss a few frogs to get there.. trust me HE IS OUT THERE!!!

It took me FOREVER to find my man (almost to a "t" from what you described other than the ice skating and flowers because I am not a fan)
He is there and he will be worth it!

And who CARES if your single I rocked it like I owned it even though EVERY one I know got married and is having babies... So yeah it will all work out!

And you do deserve the best!

SLM said...

You need to find yourself a soldier!! Hhahahaha oh and thanks for the visuals!!

Anastasia said...

And you apparently want a guy with bed head. Artfully maintained bed head of course ;)

Tamara said...

Ohhhh, what a good post thanks to all the sexy visuals, lol.

Don't settle, the right one is out there, he's just a little hard to find, but you'll find him, chances are he's looking for you too!

SS said...

Of course you shouldn't settle! Girly, at 26, you are far from being at the end of the road... you will find the combination that works for you, and the more learning about yourself that happen until then the better off you will be. :-)