Sunday, June 14, 2009

To Skype or Not To Skype

Let's start with a definition for those who may not know what Skype is. 

Skype is basically a free internet telephone and video service. All you have to do is download the free program, add your contacts and bam you can video chat with them. 

Now why am I talking about this program? If you're dating, engaged, married or closely acquainted with someone in the military and is serving in Iraq, A-Stan or some other godforsaken place then more than likely you've tried to use this program. Basically, it's good for anyone who wants to see someone that's not within driving distance. It's a free way to actually get to see your loved one. 

I love this program. I've grown to love it a lot. I don't know who started it but they are genius. 


d.a.r. said...

This is a really good question and I think only one that you can answer :)

All that being said....we haven't. Zach has been at a teeny tiny outpost for the entire deployment. We are lucky if we get to catch up via email once a week. The internet is just too slow to use a webcam/skype/chat.

And while it is sad and occasionally makes me upset because well, everyone ELSE does! I also am kinda relieved by it. Doesn't that sound horrible?? But, our very best methods of coping are staying busy and denial. I don't have time to sit at my computer for 45 minutes every day chatting like a lot of wives do. I am pretty hit or miss on the computer and while I am on it frequently, it is never for longer than 5 minutes. And for me, seeing him but NOT being with him would make it harder for me, I think. It was nice yesterday for his promotion, but for a daily basis? I think it would make this deployment drag on and on and on.

That's just me and my denial issue though. So far, it's worked great for 9 months so I'm not about to change hahaha!

Cassandra said...

Aww I'm so sorry hun. Goodbyes suck big time.

I can promise you though that the time will pass. We can't control it or the events that happen between now and then but I promise the month of November will come and pass and you'll have him home again.

I wish I could make it better for you but remember that we are all here for you and we'll all be celebrating with you when November comes.

Big hugs and hang in there girl

Samantha said...

ahh... great question! d.a.r. is right though. You guys have to find what works best for BOTH of you! I know that, for instance, my bro-in-law 'can't' talk to my sister everyday, multiple times a day it makes the entire situation more difficult on him. My sister would prefer a bit more conversation but what they do works for her as well. I know exactly what you mean though... sometimes hearing Kevin's voice or seeing him on the webcam is extremely difficult on me too. You and Matt have to hash out what works best. Maybe talking (everyday if that is an option) but no webcam is best? OR phone and not internet... just a have to find the rhythm that works best. =)

Rachael said...

Well, I have never used Skype, but I think that once the initial shock of him leaving and being over there has worn off and you've adjusted a little bit, using Skype would be easier.

I don't know how he felt emotionally afterwards, but if it's too upsetting to you both, than I say just don't do it.

Its a hard call and I definitely agree with the other girls here. Its all about what fits and works for you.

Jessica said...

Like all the above comments, I agree, you really have to do what you are both comfortable with. And you'll find whatever that is. My opinion though.. I think skyping every now and then might help break it up? If Trey and I were in the same situation I THINK I'd like to see his handsome face every now and then. I think it would make me feel better when I was really really missing him!

lola said...

For us, I take it where we can get it. Because his hours are so opposite of mine, taking time to skype usually involves me staying up much later than I should and makes me cranky. However, I do take any chances to "see him" that I can, although it has been less and less frequent.

I think the best thing to do is to think about each chance you get as time to be thankful for and not get too upset by it. Easier said than done though!

Amber @ A Little Pink in the Cornfields said...

I agree with everyone else... Although. I know if it were me I don't think I would be able to resist! Thank goodness for technology today, what would we do without it?
Hang in there hon! I'm thinking of you both and grateful for men like yours! :)

Casey (@ Chaos and Cardboard) said...

That's a tough one! Hopefully you can find something that helps you to deal with the separation without having to say goodbye all over again every time...

Unknown said...

I never used Skype while Rob was in Iraq or Afghanistan. We used Yahoo messanger and a webcam, but I loved it! When he was in Iraq, we had yet to phyiscally meet though, so our situation was a little different...However, when he was in Afghanistan, we had met several times and it was still wonderful, even though my heart ached for him...Bitter sweet I'd say...It'll get easier!

Katie said...

When Josh and I did long distance while I was away at college we didn't have skype, and now looking back I kinda wish we did, but at the same time I don't.

I get really attached, and I think it would have made it harder, I cried just saying goodbye on the phone, so skype probably would have made me a huge mess.

Anyways, I've seen you around the bloggy world for a while now and I think its time I follow you! haha :)

Feel better soon!

In This Wonderful Life said...

I like the idea of skype for your situation! maybe not all the time..but every now and then. something to look forward to ya know? just talk to him and see what he thinks! hope you had a good day :)

Ashley said...

I am so excited that you found my blog. I died laughing when I saw your blgg post! I just got finished having a converstaion with my husband about Skype. He is going to the BX tomorrow to pick up a webcam! This will be our first time to try it. When he was deployed to Iraq, he didn't have internet or a laptop. His laptop has been running really slow though, hopefully it will work!!

Shoshanah said...

I think it'd be a little silly not a take advantage of skype.

I had a friend that lived in Italy a few years ago, and we used to skype (not quite the same I know). But the best was we'd us and 2 other friends would all talk together, it was a nice way to catch up on everybody's life together. And cell phone don't working very well at have multiple lines together.